At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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