"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
