Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize