didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
