how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
