these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Randomize
