He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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