Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
