im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
and you fell through a lawn chair
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