Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize