Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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