She's JV to your varsity
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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