Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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