I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
