Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Terrible idea I love it
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
