Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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