Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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