awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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