Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize