you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize