I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
