OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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