'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I just found puke in my bra..
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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