Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I AM VODKA MAN
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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