She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize