Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
