so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
