Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
