Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
