I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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