He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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