Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
