there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
