May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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