You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
