I wish I could punch you in the face.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
