There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize