I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
