Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
