suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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