She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
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