You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize