Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I need help removing her.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
