My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
