i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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