Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
