You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
