Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
