One girl and one boy is just not enough.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
