sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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