She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
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